Time for a serious Oxford Street lunch with Lance Leopard, but not till after an even more serious viewing of Valley of the Dolls, a movie Lance agrees is a “great starting point for any camp movie collection’.
Join Maynard as he visits Lance Leopard, high in his ivory tower of scuttlebutt, where all secrets are hidden and revealed, overlooking the inhospitable wilds of Darlinghurst.
Topics covered in this show include, Delilah, The Gibson Brothers, Madonna’s movie career, Jane Fonda, Liberace, Marilyn Monroe on the piano, Bill Collins, Village People, Claire de Lune, Joe Hasham and ABBA.
Lance declares two “stupid films” that should never have been made. While Maynard gets the best scene from Tank Girl wrong.
And the next time someone you know isn’t getting what you are saying, just do what Lance does, and ask them; “can you hear the drums Fernando?”.
Lance did have a few other things he wished to be quoted on;
“I’m glad you’re working hard on this show Maynard, I’m as lazy as Dean Martin.”
“I thought the Madonna film Body of Evidence was a great film in a genre I’ve made up called faux Hitchcock.”
“Madonna can act, when she’s directed well and she’s not the leading character.”
“My favourite Bond film is Moonraker, it’s James Bond in space AND Shirley Bassey belts out the theme song.”
“I ironed Neil Tenant’s pants once backstage because the Pet Shop Boys wardrobe assistant had gone missing at The Phoenix Bar on ecstasy or something. I blame the gays.”
“I have long arms, so it never looks like I’m taking a selfie. It looks like I’m just waving.”
“I’ve been called a gay icon, and I’ve been called worse.”
“Now a new audience has rediscovered me, I’m trapped with my quiff, my perfect eyebrows and my matte complexion.”
” Now that I’m older, I’ve realised timing and lighting is EVERYTHING.”
Enjoy your lunch with Lance, see you at the buffet….
It was with sadness I heard of the passing of Paul Gray. He was a great Musical Director across many genres and his work when on tour (with many unexpected challenges) always pulled a potentially difficult show into a good evening of entertainment.
His work with Waa Waa Nee is also an Australian pop legacy, that on the Totally 80s tour across Australia was very welcome every night.
He was always busy on tour, it was tough to find time for him to chat. He is here in this show from the 24 minute to 29 minute point of this show. Talking about the tour and the other 1980s bands that were the contemporaries of Waa Waa Nee. Recorded backstage during the Totally 80s Newcastle show at The Civic Theatre.
Lance Leopard is a gay icon and legendary gossip columnist from the glamorous 1990s of the Oxford Street strip, and beyond. Join us in Lance Leopard’s new spot. An ivory tower high above the fray, overlooking Darlinghurst, where secrets are both hidden and revealed.
During his tenure as chief gossip and stirrer of The Scene in his weekly columns in The Star Observer, Capital Q, Out Biz and more, he dished the dirt and smeared the eyeliner without fear or favour.
Lance even has celebrity advice for Dannii Minogue (a child superstar), Cybill Shepherd (selfish bitch) and his Mum (Ikeep my manners around her and try and teach her a few).
Join us for drinks won’t you?
I present short history of quotes from Lance Leopard;
“I can admit it now because I’m retired”
“People “remember” me doing all sorts of things. It might not have been me they actually remember. It could have been Sexy Galexy for all I know.”
“The more you do something, the better you get at it. Or else you’re always dreadful and no one will tell you.”
“Brisbane is like Baltimore, it’s one of those nutty little towns that just has its own thing.”
“I don’t know if I should say this.”
“If people are complaining there isn’t a scene. They can go out there and make one.”
“I liked it when my columns were in magazines people had to actually buy. I made more of an effort then.”
“Everybody has an opinion now days. But if it’s not an informed opinion, it’s a lousy opinion, and who needs to hear it?”
When asked at what point in history Lance would have liked to have lived;
“I would have picked the good years of Versailles. Before everybody got angry and started demanding cake.”
On the world of gossip a learned Lance quotes Ru Paul;
“What people say about you behind your back is none of your business.”
Collette had a huge hit in Australia in 1989 with her cover of the Anita Ward disco classic Ring My Bell which was co-produced by Pee Wee Ferris and Kirk Godfrey.
Far from a one hit wonder, Collette Roberts had 2 other charting singles off her first Raze The Roof album and a reasonable amount of nightclub plays for Upside Down & This Will Be (Everlasting Love) from her second album Attitude in 1991.
Always a fun, yet strangely controversial guest on the breakfast show, here we are from December 1990.
Collette spoke with me in studio 217 at JJJ in William St, Kings Cross about her last single “Who Do You Think You Are?” and her new single “Upside Down”. Also discussed were hooded tops, deep house & Fiji. I’ve thrown in some Xmas ID’s and a safe sex message to give you that early 90s feel.
Two interviews with Melbourne’s Bachelors from Prague, 1989 & 1990. Henry Maas & Andrew Philipp are both up early (twice) to talk about The Energetic Cool and Great albums.
Despite my not really being able to describe their sound or genre accurately, Henry and Andrew are very patient with me. Even going so far as to give me a job offer.
All the important issues are covered, the size of their dressing room, why they don’t wear bright colours and is their manager Mario Macaroni a fictional character?
We even namecheck a few long gone venues like The Harbourside Brasserie and IDs.
Thankyou to Bachelors from Prague for all the very cool good times.
And they are back,so go see them! (and their dressing room)